Nothing ruins an appetite like running into your ex-boyfriend at Denny’s restaurant. And not just any ex-boyfriend. The ex-boyfriend.
Pulling into the parking lot, I noticed a line outside of Denny’s. Craving “Moons Over My Hammy” I asked Eric, the twenty-three year old I was dating, to drive closer so I could see how long the wait was. And while I expected a line (after all, we were at a three-day music festival in Palm Desert), I didn’t expect to see my most significant ex-boyfriend queuing up for breakfast.
According to my ex, there was a thirty minute wait.
So, I swiftly abandoned my craving for ham and eggs as we drove to Pizza Hut for breakfast. But I held it together. For like five seconds. And then ran to the bathroom and cried into the brown paper towels until my pizza was ready. After all, there was no denying it: I had fallen into the hot desert of ex-hell.
Needless to say, the rest of the day passed in a blur under the beer tent of Coachella. The blur of knowing that somewhere in this converted polo field was my ex-boyfriend. Somewhere he was listening to the same trendy band as I was. Maybe even drinking the same shitty beer. But as the temperature hit 106 degrees, I realized why cocktails should always be served in hell.
If you were trapped in the desert with your ex, what would you drink?
3.11.2008
Moons Over My Hammy
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20 comments:
if you love pina coladas...and being caught in the hot desert with an ex. yikes. might have to go for tequila shots STAT in that situation!
When you can't beat 'em join 'em - order something flaming!
dos equis XXX
A bottle, I mean a glass of chardonnay and a couple of happy pills?
Hey, the guy has got to be a jack ass to lose you. Be my girlfriend and I'll buy you all the drinks you want.
HAHAH he was in line for goons-that-look-clammy. Pizza Hut rules for breakfast - supreme pan pizza with side of bacon and fresh squeezed OJ! MMmmmm
nothing tastes good when it's that freakin' hot
You should have made a bee-line for Vegas and drowned your sorrows with a host of other sorry folks. Misery loves company. And it's air conditioned.
Lots and lots of Mimosas (Champagne and OJ). Add a cherry and you have a perfect little escape in a pretty fluted glass. Just because one is in ex-hell is no excuse for lack of refinement. Or sobriety. Or scurvy.
Got to hate the ex-factor... especially when you are hot and sweaty in the depths of the desert! Love it!
good question. if i ran into her in the desert, I think I'd have her drink her own blood
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Well, I'm not sure oh yes I am it would defiantly be tequila & I guess shitty beer . But I want to know more about the 23 yr old .Not to bad !
O.K. try this one , southern comfort , tequila, & amerato ,on the rocks sounds bad but it hit you right in the head so you forget all the old xxx's
I'm thinking a car bomb would be good at a time like this . ( Glass of beer with shot of Irish whiskey glass and all dropped in the beer ) 1 or 2 is a good start .
Hell, if was in a desert, I'd drink whatever fluid I could lay my hands on. Preferably alcoholic.
Martinis! The classy way to forget.
at least it wasnt burning man. and you were naked.
are you kidding...martini...martini...martini...definitely fitting for such an occasion considering I have way more class than he does anyway...
And then I'd start crying!
i would drink champagne - celebrate your ex, youre done with him!
Well, it sounds like TEQUILA is the go to drink for ex run-ins. I just hope I don't get to the worm. I have a lot of ex-boyfriends.
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